In 2008, the diagnosis of breast cancer shook the core of my being. With no family history of cancer and a clean mammogram report from the previous year, I was too young to be struck with this illness…I thought. My children were only 2 and 5 at the time. I went before God and started confessing all the sins that I could remember, especially of jealousy, bitterness, anger and complaints. I asked for God’s forgiveness before asking for His healing. With much prayer support from many brothers and sisters, I went ahead with the surgery and awaited radiation treatment.
To my surprise, the pathology report after the surgery concluded that there were more cancer cells in the surrounding areas. Another surgery and chemotherapy were scheduled. I could not wrap my mind around this. Fear, sadness, and worries all began to set in. This was the time when the Word of God in Philippians 4:6-7 reminded me, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
When I was alone in my house, I stood in the living room and cried out in a very loud and desperate voice to the Lord. I pronounced God’s sovereignty and love. I confessed my sins and renounced any depression and worries. By faith, I received His healing. I declared victory over cancer and that the long scars on my body had no hold on me. The Lord surely heard my cry. After the second surgery, I knew I was at peace with myself and my illness. God loved me dearly and God was faithful. The chemotherapy treatment began soon after. The side effects were under control and I did not get sick during those few months. After all the treatment cycles, I began to recover. God affirmed that He healed me and I needed to hold onto Him tightly.
God did not heal me miraculously but allowed me to go through surgeries and treatments. However, His grace and provision were never lacking. A month before I was diagnosed, my sister quit her job and went on a long vacation to rest. She was therefore able to move from Seattle to San Jose to take care of my children and my family for over 6 months. God also healed my marriage by allowing me to see that my husband was chosen to support me in sickness and in health. I used to complain about his poor communication skills and harbored bitterness because he could not understand my needs. During my illness, he never once complained, blamed, questioned or fret. His quietness was a blessing to me, setting me free from guilt and fear. The Lord charged me to love my husband and treasure my marriage.
There is no short-cut or back door to experiencing God’s power and healing. He led me through the darkest valley to fully experience His faithfulness. Life is full of unknowns. Cancer, illnesses, and even disasters continue to cast shadows in my life. But God promises that He will never forsake us. God holds my future and He will guide me through the storms of life. He is a God worthy of our praise and trust.